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Mind Your Manners and Win at Work "Man uses wrong fork at business lunch; loses business deal" "Woman commits meeting faux pas; business goes to competitor" "Off-color joke costs company big sale" You don't see these headlines in the newspapers because one or two little mistakes aren't usually credited with scuttling a business deal. But little mistakes add up, and they're usually totally unnecessary. So where can you turn for help? A Seattle author, Mary Mitchell, has written a book that's just come out in paperback called "Class Acts: How Good Manners Create Good Relationships and Good Relationships Create Good Business" (M. Evans and Co. Inc., www.mevans.com). Using proper etiquette might not garner you a big promotion or a big sale, but it can't hurt. "Nobody will tell you that you didn't get the job because you're a pig" at the lunch table, Mitchell said, but it may be a contributing factor. Mitchell advocates using good manners (just like your mother said, use "please" and "thank you") so you'll be perceived as a person with "class." How can good manners help in the business world? Knowing manners helps one become a "class act," and a "class act" lives a "civil, successful, and centered" life, she said. But it's hard work. Mitchell's "Class Acts" book has 40 separate chapters on how to interact, dress, eat, speak, and even how to successfully attend meetings. There's more to attending a meeting than just sitting in a chair for two hours, she said. She said a meeting is not the time to pull out your Blackberry personal digital assistant and plan your Christmas vacation or surf the Net. "You're in a meeting. Be there 100 percent. Contribute. Maybe you can shorten the meeting" if it's not productive, she said. And if you're the one running the meeting, Mitchell lists some tips from a former White House social secretary on how to properly perform the task. There are many tips on how to become a "class act" in Mitchell's books, including chapters that many people in Seattle haven't read yet, such as the recommendation that one should pull over to the side of the road to make a cell-phone call. There are a lot of rules to remember, including rules on how to eat at a business lunch. If you're at a luncheon banquet where there are 12 people crammed around a table that was obviously meant to accommodate eight diners, which bread plate do you use? Which water glass in front of you is yours? Mitchell's tips to remember: Put your thumb and forefinger together on your left hand, look at it, and it appears to be the lower-case letter "b." Which stands for "bread" and that means your bread plate is on your left. Do the same thing on your right hand, and you'll create a lower-case letter "d," which stands for drink, and that means your water glass is on your right. Why all the rules? They're important, she said. "You'll repeat the same mistakes" over and over, and never realize that your bad manners kept you from making a sale or getting that promotion, she said. |